Don't Panic
by Homely
Summary: You were brighter than the pale white moon, reflected in your eyes. So I guess it's no surprise I can't forget you... RoxasNaminé. UPDATE: I know it's been two years guys, but this story is officially OFF hiatus.
1. I would never forget you

**DON'T PANIC**

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_Prologue__**; I would never forget you.**_

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**- RxN -**

When I was seven years old, my mother told me something interesting.

"You have a gift." She had spoke to me, kneeling down on knee to reach my eye level.

"A gift?" I inquired innocently, my childish mind not able to quite comprehend what she was truly saying to me. I was much too young to know what it meant. I imagined myself being showered with presents; Something that had never happened to me, not even on my birthday. But of course, this was far from the truth behind her words.

Even though I didn't understand the full meaning of her words, I held them close to me. I was determined to decipher the message behind them, as if it were some kind of mystery that would send me on an adventure, full of thrills and excitement. To me, it meant that much.

Not long after, she passed away. My step-father, an englishman whom I somewhat remember, had said that it was cancer, though like most things I did not know what it meant. I realized then that I had held her words so closely because they were the only thing she'd left me with. They were the only encouraging words she'd ever uttered to me, and once her voice was gone, I missed her for the first time.

My mother was a cold and bitter woman from what I could remember. She paid me little attention and focused entirely on my sister. It had been said that Kairi was the most promising child since mother herself; she was smart, beautiful, and she possessed incredible musical talent. Even at such a young age, Kairi was a perfectionist in the art of music. Her voice could hit every note on the scale, and was taught first hand by our mother how to play the flute flawlessly. I envied this, for my mother had never taught me anything. Naturally, Kairi was her number one, our older brother Cloud being number two, and our other sister Xion came in number three.

I was always at the bottom of the list, no matter what.

Though Cloud was a bit of a troublemaker, he, like Kairi, showed much promise. It took much longer for Cloud's gift to come out. Apparently, he'd been nothing but a talentless little brat up until he was ten, when it was discovered that he was very good at athletics. Any sport; Football, soccer... You name it, he could play it. And Xion, one of the triplets just like myself, was an annoying, bratty and troublesome child, but like everyone else in the family, she had talent. She was gifted in the art of the theater, or in other words, she could act.

From a very young age I learned that I possessed no talent whatsoever. I was undoubtably the runt of the litter. Though Kairi, Xion and I were all sisters the three of us were nothing alike.

For the most part, my two sisters did not get along. Then again, Kairi was very picky about who she hung out with, even as a child. She had her group of friends, as did Xion. I, however, always remained as nothing but the runt of the litter. Even at school I was unpopular. So growing up, I didn't have any group of friends, or any friends at all. I barely had any acquaintances and none of the teachers ever liked me, not to mention how terrible I was in almost every subject.

In the fourth grade, our step-father had enough of dealing with us. He wasn't a very nice man, but he was the only father I ever knew. I was hurt when I found out that he'd left us forever. We were then moved from the tropical Destiny Islands to the hustle and bustle of city life in Twilight Town, a large city with such a high population. There, we lived in a huge mansion with our uncle Ansem. He was a brilliant, wealthy man of many talents. And again, there was another star to shine in my family, who only made me seem even duller.

What did my mother mean when she said that I had a gift? Perhaps the gift of being tragically easy to pick on every year I attended school, because that was the only thing that anyone ever saw in me.

I would never forget my first day of grade six. It was a sunny, cheerful day at Twilight Elementary; This day being one of the most vivid in my memory. It started the dawn of a new era for my life, but not in a good way. As I doodled away on a sheet of paper, minding my own business, I could hear some giggling from nearby. I was almost eleven years old now, no longer the same child I used to be. I had grown up considerably after what my family and I had gone through. I wasn't so naive; I knew what type of person my sister had become. And I recognized that awful, obnoxious giggle I'd grown to despise.

I slowly turned my head from my paper to Kairi, who was sitting and laughing with her best friend, Sora. She was always popular among the boys, another asset I couldn't help but cringe over, because I wished for it so much. They looked at me and laughed, then looked away and whispered some more. I felt my heart sink, for it was clear that they were making fun of me. I hated being picked on, but it was all Kairi ever seemed to do.

I tried to ignore their laughter but it haunted me, even as I tried to focus on something else. Before long, I saw Kairi approaching my desk from my peripheral vision. She had a devious smirk on her lips, which just screamed trouble.

"Hey sis," She said, casually leaning on my desk.

"Hello." I said blandly, keeping my eyes glued to my desk. She laughed maniacally.

"You've got a little something on your dress." She told me with a devilish grin. My eyebrows furrowed with confusion as I looked to my thigh.

"There's nothing." I said.

"Look at your butt, stupid."

My eyes widened with fear. _Oh god Kairi, what have you done now_... Slowly and cautiously I got up and looked behind my dress, but much to my surprise there was nothing. It was still the crisp white it was when I'd put it on, until, as if out of no where, something red flicked right across my bum. Horrified, I looked in the direction it'd came from. just to see Sora loading more strawberry jam onto a spoon. He flicked it at me again and I yelped in shock, just as Selphie Tilmitt stood up and shouted:

"NAMINÉ GOT HER PERIOD!"

And the rest is all history. I guess that was the day I finally snapped. From that point on, I was literally considered 'nobody'. I shut myself off from people, never talking to them unless they talked to me. I minded my own business 24/7, and eventually, people stop talking about my 'period'. They stopped talking about me. All in all, I was forgotten. And that was just the way I liked it.

Come high school, I was no different. No different, until I met him.

Until I met the first boy to ever notice me. The first boy I'd ever found a friend in, and the first boy I'd ever fallen in love with. He affected my life in so many ways; changing me for the better, helping me find that inner confidence that I needed to discover...

Roxas..._** I would never forget you.**_

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Author's note: Hey everybody! Thanks for reading this far. I'm skeptical about this story, but it was an idea that wouldn't leave me alone so... Lemme know whatcha think ;D.

I usually don't do things like this... Its just a story entirely done from Naminé's point of view. I usually like switching it up so I can throw in many people's stories, but this one is just about her and Roxas. This is just a prologue, and it gets much better, but I hope you like it anyways.

Review please! Let me know if I should continue (:.

**EDIT: **This first chapter has been revised since originally posted in 2010. The rest of the chapters I am leaving.


	2. I would never forget my hero

**D O N T P A N I C ;**

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_Chapter__ One; _**_I would never forget my hero._**

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**- RxN -**

It rained a lot in Twilight Town. More so then it ever did in Destiny Islands, and no matter how many years I lived there, I never got used to it. It was one of those things, like a fly constantly buzzing around your head. One of those things you just couldn't ignore, but at the same time, you could not get used to.

But there was one, warm, humid and very rainy night that stood out from the others. On average, this would just be an ordinary day but... It was quite different, for it was my last night being free. Free of school. Summer was coming to an end, and for the first time I would be entering high school as a freshman. I was nervous, anxious, depressed... And there was nothing I could do about it. I never knew any ways of dealing with anxiety and stress, so for the most part, I had to just get through it.

I was laying in my bed, eyes fixated on the white celling above me, I silently listened to the heavy raindrops outside. The only light was that of the moon, just barely seeping through the curtains. This was one of those nights where I felt the most alone, and that really got me thinking. I thought about myself, and every little thing in my life. Of course, there wasn't really much to think about.

I could faintly hear the sound of Xion's music blasting in the other room, and I couldn't help but roll my eyes. She was going through some sort of 'rebellious' stage, so naturally she got on everyone's nerves. I imagined that Cloud was downstairs, either watching TV, eating or talking with Uncle Ansem, while Kairi was probably deciding what she was going to wear tomorrow. And as if on cue, I heard a loud and brash knocking at my door. It startled me out of my reverie, and I shot up straight on the bed I was once beached upon.

"Nam?" Kairi's melodic voice rang in my ears like a school bell. I cringed, only wondering what she could possibly want.

"Come in." I said quietly, just loud enough for her to head and come barging in. Her hair was tied back off her face, and she was holding up two outfits.

"Which one?" She asked. I sensed a bit of desperateness in her voice. I nonchalantly skimmed over the outfits. In my eyes, they both looked the same; Pink, Hollister, revealing... What else was new?

"I dunno." I shrugged. "Sorry."

She scoffed loudly. "Well I have to know what to wear tomorrow! And I can't ask Cloud, duh. Xion is being such a bitch-- Can someone say PMS? And Uncle Ansem? Barf, I don't want his opinion."

I inwardly groaned. The way Kairi spoke made my stomach churn... Literally. Either way, I decided on one of the outfits. Really, I just wanted her out of my room. It was my only safe haven, other then the ravine.

"Why don't you go out or something?" Kairi asked me, a certain bitchiness lacing her voice. Her hip was popped out, with her hand resting on it, and one of her thin eyebrows were raised sarcastically. This was often how Kairi looked and acted towards me.

"I've nowhere to go." I answered truthfully. "And its raining. What would I do?"

"Go to the mall or something... Its only eight o'clock. Maybe you can buy a social life..." She snorted and giggled, but I didn't reply. I was used to it. "I'm sneaking out to this party tonight with Selphie. Don't tell the old man, I can't get caught."

"But school's tomorrow." I muttered, afraid of the criticism I would get from that one small comment.

"Whatever." She said. "I'm gonna be late if I don't leave soon so... Peace. Cover for me."

And with that, she was gone. I didn't really think much of it, Kairi had always acted this way. Much like her attitude, I was used to it.

But for once in my life, Kairi's words had actually gotten to me a little. I was always jealous of her personality, despite how rotten it could be. She was confident; I envied that greatly.

I don't know what I was thinking, but I snuck out of the house. I had nowhere to go, nothing to do... I just wanted to get the hell out of my room for once. I wanted to see the town at night. I wanted to feel the same thrills that Kairi felt, just one time... One time, before I was thrown back into prison for the entire year. The air was hot on my skin but the rain felt cool. It was a strangely amazing sensation which I had never experienced before... And as I walked further down the street, I slowly began to feel alive. Something about that night was so compelling.

But it was nearly eleven o'clock when I snuck out. I'd never been out so late-- Not once in my whole life. I was not smart when it came to common sense, such as 'never go out alone after dark'. I didn't know that there were such bad people out there... Twilight Town was a good city. So where did those people come from? Perhaps I was just too naive.

I felt true fear for the first time in my life that night. I felt what it was really like to be afraid that something bad would happen, that something bad really _could _happen... And it did.

In a red sports car, license plate number '420', were four terrifying individuals I would never forget.

The car sped ahead of me and did a complete u-turn, until I was standing face-to-face with it. All at once, all four men piled out of the vehicle and within moments were standing before me. I didn't know what to make of it... I was scared, but not nearly as scared as I would be.

"What's a girl like you doing out here so late?" One man said, stepping a foot closer to me. My heart began to race... And at that moment, I decided that leaving the house was not a good idea. I would never _ever _do it again.

"Maybe she's lost." Another one said.

"Maybe she's stupid." Said one.

"She's kinda cute."

"Axel."

"What?"

"Should we take her?"

"Yeah. Grab 'er."

Before I could even process what was going on, I felt four pairs of hands snatching at my frail body. They tried to pull me, touch me (in places I never wanted anybody to touch...), until I was on the ground, being dragged towards their car. But suddenly, I was dropped. My head smashed painfully to the cement below me, and just then everything seemed so surreal.

"Is that R?" Someone asked. I could barely see anything through my hazed vision, and I could not move. All I could do was sit and listen, and wait for something to happen. I heard a sound, something like roller blades or a skateboard.

"Its R!" One man shouted, alarmed.

"Shit!" At that time, I think that they all began to scramble into the car.

"What about the girl?"

"She's not worth it, just ditch 'er!"

The last thing I heard was car doors slamming shut, before my hearing went numb. There was a faint ringing in my ears, and the last thing I saw before darkness was a pair of pale blue eyes.

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When my eyes fluttered open, the night was still young. I could see the moon clear in the sky, right above my head. I didn't know where I was or what had happened, but I was very frightened. I couldn't remember anything after the men started to grab me, other than those comforting blue eyes I had only momentarily gazed into. And even then, they were a blur. I tried to take in my surroundings but I couldn't move my head... It was being supported by something.

"You're awake..."

The sound of the boy's voice startled me. I didn't know who he was... If he was good, or if he was bad. I prayed to god that he was good.

"Where do you live? I'll take you home."

"W-What?" I barely managed to stutter.

"I'll take you home."

My eyes began to open and the fear melted away. His voice sounded honest and pure; It was very reassuring.

He sighed. "Can you walk?"

My eyes focused from the moon above me, and slowly drifted to his face. And needless to say, I was shocked when I saw it.

In simple terms, he was gorgeous. With big blue eyes, light blond hair and pale skin... I'd never been in contact with anyone so attractive. Was it even possible? I didn't think so. Yet there I was, laying on what I realized was a park bench. My sore head was being supported by... His hand?

I didn't know what to say, but apparently, my expression did all the talking for me. Without a word he lifted me up, and I took any helping hands he offered. After god knows how many hours, I was standing once again, and holding firmly onto the shoulder of his mysterious person. Normally, being so close to somebody (especially of the opposite sex) would be very awkward for me, but I was delusional. All I knew was that I wanted to get home, safe and sound in my bed. I regretted ever leaving that damn house...

"Where do you live?" He asked me again.

"I... I live in that..." I couldn't think of how to describe it. Nobody ever visited my house, there wasn't even a road that cars could drive down leading to it. It was through some old forest... Talk about closed off. Then again, Uncle Ansem enjoyed his privacy, which I agreed with and respected. "In the old mansion." I finally managed to utter. "Through the passage in Tram Common...

"What are you doing all the way out here?"

"Where are we..."

"Tram Common is twenty minutes from here... What were you doing?"

"I was... I was going for a walk."

Much to my surprise, the boy _laughed. _It was bad timing, if you ask me, but it was... Magical, almost. He had a beautiful laugh, mixed somewhere between a chuckle and a giggle. My eyes, which were glued to the sidewalk, then fell upon his pale face. All his features were as bright as the moon as he smiled, and at that moment, I think might have been the first time I truly fell in love with him. Of course, I did not know it at the time.

"What... Is so funny?" I convinced myself to ask. He wiped off his laughter, but his pleasant grin still remained. He met my eyes, but only for a moment.

"You picked a bad time to go for a walk."

I simply stared at him. Was it all he had to say? Apparently, yes, for he did not say anymore on the subject. Instead, he asked my name. It seemed like forever since the last time I'd heard somebody ask me that.

"Naminé." I replied, my voice quiet and shaky.

"You should be more careful, Naminé." He advised. "You can't just go wondering around at night, there are bad people like Organization Thirteen about."

"Organization Thirteen?"

"Don't worry about it. Just heed my advice, its all I can give you."

I took his words seriously, and nodded. I would listen, and I did listen.

"Who are you?" I asked him, and he stared up at the sky.

"Me?" He smiled sadly, and after a short paused responded with: "Nobody important."

"Everybody is important to someone..." I said, almost in a whisper. Judging by his expression, he didn't agree. It seemed like no time at all before we were standing outside of my mansion. I looked up at my open window which I had snuck out of hours before, and felt tears stinging my eyes. Who knows what could have happened if that boy hadn't showed up? I may have owed him my life...

But when I turned around to say goodbye, he was gone. And through I was sad, I somehow knew it was for the best. Him and I... We were clearly from two completely different worlds. He knew what he was talking about when he told me to be careful. I hoped that someday, him and I would meet again. He never did tell my his name but...

**I would never forget my hero.**

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**Author's note: **Wow! Thanks so much for the reviews, I honestly wasn't expecting this to get that many! You're all great :). This chapter was a lot longer, I hope you liked it. I know a few of your wanna know the relationship between Naminé and her other siblings... Well, in the next chapter that should become clear.

**Review please! :D**


	3. A place like this

**D O N T P A N I C ;**

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_Chapter two; **a place like this**_

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**- RxN -**

For me, the next day of came just a little too quickly. I was exhausted- Likely because it had been after one in the morning when I'd fallen asleep, and I had way too much on my mind. I only wanted to lay in bed and sit with my thoughts, but sadly that was impossible.

Cloud would be taking my sister's and I to our first day of the ninth grade. He was two years older than us, a grade eleven, so he knew his way around the school.

I was very nervous for my first day. More nervous than the eccentric Kairi, and definitely more nervous than the careless Xion. I was terrified about what people might think about me, if they would bully me and how hard it would be to deal with. I decided that my best bet was to just blend with the crowd-- So, I borrowed Kairi's white Abercrombie hoodie, and a simple pair of jeans. I hoped that I would at least look normal, and not so much like the dork I not-so-covertly was.

I made a plan for the day: One, no eye contact. Two, no talking. And three, no embarrassing myself. I was simply going to get through the day, just like every other normal teenager attending ATW High. (And yes, my uncle Ansem is the founder of my high school, Ansem the Wise High.)

I kept my eyes glued to the ground as my siblings and I walked to school. I could hear Xion and Kairi bickering, as always, and Cloud trying to break it up.

"At least I'm not a complete social reject, like you." Kairi slurred. I could practically sense that she'd added a hair flip, likely for dramatic effect.

"Pfft, whatever." Xion scoffed. "I'd rather be a so called 'social reject' than a shallow bitch."

"What?" My redheaded sister gaped. If Kairi could only hate one thing (never gonna happen), it would be people insulting her. Especially apparent 'losers' (though I disagree with that, for Xion had friends, and I didn't) like her.

"You heard me." Xion smirked slyly-- A perfect opening for Kairi to launch. In a matter of seconds, Kairi began to shove Xion and Xion happily shoved her back. And naturally, it wasn't long before a cat fight had unfolded. I stopped and watched the scene going on before me, and rolled my eyes. I looked over to Cloud, who did the same thing. He, however, was the one to intercept.

"Would you two knock it off?" He said, shoving himself between them.

"She started it!" They screeched simultaneously, pointing at one another. Cloud exhaled in annoyance.

"Its the first day of fucking school." He said. "Try and get along, its pissing me off."

"Whatever..." Kairi muttered, walking ahead of everyone. Xion laughed at her, but Cloud sent her a warning glare. The fight then stopped there, finally...

I was very used to this type of behavior from my family. Kairi and Xion were total opposites, rivals and I think they even hated each other. Cloud was somewhat mature, at least more mature than them. He did swear a lot, though...

And as usual, I was just kind of lingering. I said nothing, did nothing, and acted as nothing. I might as well have not even been there, but unfortunately I had to be. So there I was, walking to school in complete silence. I wanted to keep on walking in peace, enjoying my thoughts, but as he always did, Cloud talked to me. I was somewhat thankful for this. since no one else talked to me, but at the same time I wanted to be left alone. Of course, I didn't have the guts to say that to him.

"What's up Nam?" He asked, slowing down so he could walk beside me at my very unhurried pace.

"Erm, nothing." I said quietly, still looking down. Even though it didn't seem like it, I was sometimes comfortable around Cloud. I felt that he was the only one who didn't judge me in the family, other than uncle Ansem of course.

"Nervous for your first day?"

I nodded, and laughed lightly. "Very."

"Ah, don't be. Its not so bad, once you get used to it." As much as I wanted to, I evidently didn't believe him. Maybe for _him_ it wasn't so bad... But for me? It could only be terrible.

"Thanks..." I peeped, trying to sound sincere-- Fail.

"Don't be so scared." Cloud chuckled, an attempt at being comforting. "If any bullies threaten you, just tell me, and your big bro is on the job!"

"Cloud!" I whined. "Please don't..."

"Aw why not? Can't I stand up for my little sis?"

"No." Xion said, butting into our conversation. I was a little shocked that she wasn't tuned out in some music or something... "Naminé doesn't want you to stand up for her, because its friggen embarrassing. Like really, how weak do you look when you have to get your big brother to stand up for you?"

That wasn't actually the reason I didn't want Cloud standing up for me, but it did make sense. The _real _reason, was because I didn't want _any _attention from _anyone. _If people were going to bully me, the best I could do was ignore them. I didn't want Cloud drawing unwanted attention towards me by picking fights with other kids. I didn't really care about looking 'weak'-- I was weak.

"Thats all bull." Cloud said defiantly. "I'll kick anyone's ass who threatens Naminé, or either of you for that matter." He pointed Xion, and then to Kairi, who was walking ahead.

"Don't need to for me!" She exclaimed, turning around and walking backwards. "Sora says that he'll back me up if anyone has a problem with me! Unlike Naminé and Xion, I have my _own _friends to stand up for me."

"Oh whatever Kairi." Xion uttered. "Actually, I met this guy during summer, he's in grade eleven-- Much more effective than Sora, a niner just like you and me."

"Grade eleven?" Cloud interrupted. "What's his name? I might know him."

"Uh, _Axel." _

And as soon as Xion mentioned that name, a certain memory flooded in from the night before.

_"Axel."_

_"What?"_

_"Should we take her?"_

At that moment, I could practically feel my jaw hit the floor. Axel-- Xion was friends with someone like that?

No, that wasn't possible. This guy was bad; I knew that, because him and his little gang had tried to kidnap me. It must have been a different Axel Xion knew. Then again, she was going through a phase...

As I stood there, eyes wide and mouth agape, Cloud happened to notice my expression. He snapped his fingers in my face, pulling me out of my frightened trance.

"Hm?"

"You okay?" He asked, showing some signs of genuine concern.

"Uh, yeah." I told. "I'm fine..."

"Okay. Can we keep going then?"

We all nodded, and continued on our way.

* * *

I'd never been inside of ATW High, but Cloud promised that he'd show me where all my classes were. Sadly, Kairi, Xion and I all had the exact same schedules (I'm sure uncle Ansem arranged that), so I would have to see them every second of every day. Except for lunch, where they would presumably go off and do their own thing. I didn't know what I would do when that time came.

I had to give uncle Ansem credit; He certainly designed the place nicely. The halls were tinted Orange, Twilight Town's official color, and it was decorated pretty well. I enjoyed the statue/fountain of my uncle out front.

My homeroom was Math-- My worst subject. After that I got to 'enjoy' science (second worst), then lunch (which I was sure I would hate), and then gym (that ones a no-brainer), and then finally, a class I could agree on; Art. I had never really tried my best at drawing, painting or any of that... But at least I could tolerate it. I was, however, embarrassed of my art work. It was never very good, so I didn't ever show anybody my work.

And so began my grade nine school year.

Two months passed and nothing exciting ever happened, but at least I was getting used to the idea of high school. I began to know where everything was, like the cafeteria, the gym (the tennis courts and football field were located outside the building), and where all my classes were. I started to get used to all of the unfamiliar faces and deal with the fact that everybody else in the school had friends except me. It was fine, I was used to it.

Naturally, Kairi became the stereotypical 'popular' type. Everybody loved her (nothing ever changes) and she smuggled her way onto the cheerleading squad. Xion hung around with this mystery group of grade eleven and twelves, so I suppose she would be considered popular by their standards. Cloud was just the same, always popular and athletic. He was also planning on running for student body president.

And just like them, my life stayed pretty much the same. Nobody noticed me, so there wasn't much ridicule. There was this one stairwell in the school, where I spent my lunches alone. It was a little isolated, so not many people passed through it. But the few that did, always snickered and laughed at me. Couldn't they at least try to hide the fact that they were making fun of me? Apparently not. After all, they were Kairi's friends. Just as shallow and predictable as she was...

It was October 29th, the day right before Halloween. I hadn't gone trick-or-treating in god knows how long, and this year was likely to be no different. I remember, for some odd reason Kairi and a group of her friends passed by. She barely looked at me, of course. She had rules; I was not allowed to talk to her during school. She couldn't be seen with a loser like me.

They were just going through to get to the side of the school. Everybody snickered and gossiped, and even in the small amount of time they passed by I could hear their words.

"The new kid? I hear he's super hot." Selphie Tilmitt, the girl I would forever hold a grudge against, squealed.

"Deff!" Kairi exclaimed. "Yuffie said that he looks kinda like Sora with blond hair, only ten times hotter!"

"Hey, I heard that..." Sora grunted. Kairi laughed and playfully smacked him on the arm.

"We just _have_ to see this guy for ourselves." Selphie demanded, picking up the pace towards the doors.

"Ah, I can't wait!"

They then pooled out of the stairwell, leaving me wondering only slightly who exactly this new guy was. I brushed it off quickly; He was probably just another shallow, conceited jerk that would hang around Kairi's group. As if anyone Kairi found attractive could actually be down to earth...

But boy, was I wrong. I never expected to run into _him _in **a place like this**...

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**Author's note: **Hey everyone! Oh god, I am SO SORRY that this is moving so slow! I hope I didn't lose any readers because of the lack of Roxas and Naminé together. As of the next chapter, you're going to be seeing a _lot _of them together. So bare with me, please! XD

I'm throwing together a soundtrack for this story, which I will post later on. I love doing those :)

**Review please! Let me know if I'm being too boring with this D:**


	4. How deep his eyes were

**D O N T P A N I C ;**

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_Chapter Three; **how deep his eyes were**_

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**- RxN -**

Ah, Halloween. Probably my third least favorite holiday, next to Christmas, and my birthday. Notice how everybody else usually _loves _those holidays?

Especially Kairi. Especially _our _birthday.

But enough of that.

I have yet to explain what was so special about October 30th.

So anyways, there I was, sitting all on my lonesome in the stairwell. My daily lunch routine consisted of me eating some gross slop from the cafeteria, and doodling in my notepad. Those two things managed to fill up a whole hour and a half of my day. I always thought that the lunch period was too long, but people with friends-- People like Kairi, could strongly disagree. Even Xion loved our seemingly endless lunch period; And Xion didn't 'love' a lot of things.

Kairi was not the only sibling of mine to pass through the stairwell that day. Even the dark haired, pale skinned Xion strolled on through with her tall, rather lanky friend Axel. I wondered if the two of them had a 'thing' together, but knew not to ask those questions. Not unless I wanted to have my throat slit...

The two walked towards the same exit Kairi, Selphie and Sora had left through. Was she interested in this 'new kid' too? Probably not, Xion wasn't really like that.

"Hey." She said, waving slightly to me as she passed. This wasn't unusual; Xion was actually _somewhat _decent to me. We didn't exactly get along, but we certainly didn't argue constantly. At that point in my life, our relationship was more of a mutual understanding. We both knew what it felt like to be tortured by Kairi.

"Hi." I replied, smiling weakly. Xion's friend made me a little nervous.

"You coming to see this new guy everyone's raving about?" She inquired, and I shook my head.

"Naw... I don't think it really concerns me." I answered.

"Good answer." Axel laughed. My face flushed when his green eyes fell upon me, since I was so not used to people talking to me-- Especially guys.

"Well, I wanna see how much of a fag this guy really is." Xion snorted. "He's probably like Kairi's friends."

"That's what I thought too." I laughed.

"Alright, come on Ax, lets bolt." She shoved her redheaded friend toward the doors. He waved a little to me, and I meekly returned it. I always felt weird when people talked to me, it was such a bad trait.

I sat there doodling, probably for about forty-five minutes before another person decided to pass through my stairwell. Yes, _my _stairwell... Its not like anybody else sat there, and my uncle was the principle of the school so... I claimed it. _Mine, mine, mine. _It was one of the few things I felt I really owned, but of course I still had to share it...

This time, the person coming through came from outside the building. I couldn't see his face, only spiky blond hair. From behind, he looked a little like Sora. It then occurred to me; _The new kid? _Probably. He looked kinda preppy...

But when he turned around, well needless to say I was _thoroughly shocked. _It must have been the hair, or maybe those big, pale blue eyes... Everything about him looked so familiar, but at the same time it _comforted _me. And why did it feel that way? Well, as I examined his face I realized it almost instantly. _Is that...!?_

But before I had the chance to even think over asking him, he was gone. And as he passed, I barely even noticed how badly I was staring at him, wide thankfully, he didn't notice either. He just went on his merry way, passing through the stairwell, not uttering a peep to me. I sighed. _Just like everyone else._

I sat there, now completely baffled. Was that really him? The boy who'd saved me, only months before. His face was still fresh in my mind. It had never left my memory; Not once since I last met him. There were often times where I wondered about him; Who he was, if I'd ever see him again... And now, right in my own school, lied my opportunity. A small smile passed my lips. If he was the boy who'd saved me, then he would certainly remember me... Right?

And maybe he wasn't just like everyone else. I mean-- He saved me. I didn't know what those men could have done. They might have killed me, or maybe just done some of those horrible things I sometimes read about in the newspaper. Either way, I at least owed him my thanks. He deserved that much. He didn't have to save me that night. He very well could have just left me there, even after the men had gone. I believe it was his choice to watch me, and take me home when I finally awoke. No... Not _just anyone _would do that.

So I decided; Made a plan. I _would _talk to him, even if it meant complete and total embarrassment.

* * *

After school rolled around (my favorite part of the day) and I left the school in a hurry. I used my expert eavesdropping skills to listen in on some gossip that the new kid would be playing basketball again outside after school. I wondered if he was trying out for the team, or maybe he just enjoyed the sport. I still didn't know his name...

So I went to the basket ball courts, which were a little near my stairwell. And sure enough, I saw a crowd of people I knew at the 'cool clique', consisting of Kairi (dur), Selphie, Sora, Riku, and Tidus. I noticed that my hero-- I mean, the _new guy _was playing one-on-one basket ball with another kid, Hayner. Hayner's two friends I knew as Pence and Olette cheered the two on from the sidelines.

I grew nervous; This would be much easier without a crowd. But I remembered the promise I'd made to myself at lunch-- _I would talk to him, even if it meant complete and total embarrassment. _

So I did.

I marched right up to the court, and well... I patiently waited for the game to be over. Him and Hayner finally stopped their sparring, and he grabbed a water bottle from beside his backpack. He really got into the sport; I could tell by his sweatiness and flushed cheeks. Somehow, even in a state like that, he managed to look really cute. I think he was possibly the first boy I was ever attracted to, even in the least. I never payed attention to things like looks, because I never understood relationships and boyfriends. I had no sexual nature, obviously.

"See you guys later." He said, waving to his new friends. I rolled my eyes as Kairi and Selphie swooned at his simple goodbye.

Typical.

All of the others that were spectating him then dispersed, leaving me alone on the premises. I gulped. _This is going to be tough..._

After many moments of anticipation, I realized that he was going to leave. The only reason he still dwelled was because he was packing his stuff into his bag. So, I swallowed my anxiety and walked right up to him. He stood up straight after bending over to close his pack. When his eyes met mine, I was suddenly at a loss for words. He stared at me oddly. After a moment of me just staring right into his hypnotic eyes, he broke the silence.

"Hello..." He said, his voice as smooth and wonderful as I remembered it. I knew this was him... It had to be.

"H-Hi." I stammered quietly.

"Can I uh, help you?" He queried, uncertainty lacing his voice.

"I know you." I suddenly sputtered, taking him completely off guard. He raised an eyebrow.

"You do?"

I nodded. "Yes. I do."

"I'm sorry..." He laughed. "But I don't know you."

A sudden rush of sorrow washed over me. _He doesn't remember?_ I opened my mouth to speak but no words came, like a lump was forming in my throat. I quickly swallowed it, before he thought I was too weird.

"Y-You don't remember?"

He shook his head. "No."

"My name is Naminé." I saw a slight change in his expression, but it wasn't all that noticeable. I just can sometimes overanalyze things... "I was out for a walk, two or so months ago... Just before school started. I got lost, you helped me..."

His face fell. "I don't know you." He insisted, his velvety voice suddenly unnecessarily brash.

"B-But... I know it was you." I expressed. "I remember! I just wanted to say thank--"

"Don't." He cut me off. His face now read the utmost seriousness. It almost frightened me... But I couldn't see him that way. He wasn't a bad person; I could tell by **how deep his eyes were**. "Look... I don't know who you are." He looked around and lowered his voice, careful that no one nearby would overhear our conversation. He bit his lip slightly, before looking straight into my glassy eyes. "Now quit being a _freak _and leave me alone."

My eyes widened. Almost immediately my chest pained at his harsh words. I'd been called a freak before, but I had put faith into this boy. Though it was true I did not know that, at the time I was so young and naive. I felt like I already knew him, just because he saved my life. But no, that was not the case. If only I'd been more careful...

He turned to walk away, but without thinking I stopped him. I lightly tapped his bare arm, which felt cool to the touch. He shuddered a little.

"Don't walk away." I pleaded. "Who are you?."

He turned to face me, his eyes showing a glimmer of sadness which somehow broke my heart. His eyes had that power over me, it was something I could not control. _"Nobody important." _He replied, his words bringing back a faint memory.

"See!" I exclaimed. "There! Its you, I know its you." And yet again, he raised an eyebrow. Before he could criticize me further, I continued. "I asked you who you were, and you replied _nobody important. _I remember you saving me, you walked me home and everything, and you mentioned those bad guys, Organization Thirteen, was it?"

Suddenly, he tightly clasped his hand over my mouth. My eyes widened, wondering what he was doing. But it all happened so fast, I didn't know what to say. Not that I could speak anyways, what with his hand clasped so tightly over my mouth. I felt my cheeks redden considerably from the sudden contact. Not only was I not used to talking to men, I was certainly not used to being _touched _by them. In any way.

"Don't talk about them." He growled. "Do you have any idea how dangerous that is? If they find out you know about them, you're _dead. _I'm serious."

And he very well was serious. The look in his eyes showed to lies at all, not even in the least. I quickly grew frightened. Once he read my shocked expression, I think that he knew I got the message. Very slowly, dramatically, he removed his hand.

"Come on." He said through a sigh. "Lets go for coffee. I owe you an explanation..."

* * *

**Author's note: **Hey everyone! Thanks for the reviews, I really appreciate it! :D. A reviewer pointed out that I put in October 29th in the last chapter. I meant October 30th aha :P.

***Edit* **I changed the summery displayed for the story.

**Review please!**


	5. I knew what it meant

**D O N T P A N I C ;**

* * *

_Chapter five; **I knew what it meant.**_

* * *

**- RxN -**

With that, this mysterious blond stranger lead me over to Paupu Juice Bar and Coffee, a little shop located near ATW. It was where most of the 'trendy people' like Kairi hung out, so naturally I felt out of place. But thankfully, when we entered I saw nobody I knew. So he got us a table, and we began to talk.

"You... You didn't tell me your name." I pointed out nervously. It all felt so strange, me being there in such a popular place, with such a popular boy...

He laughed a little, his smile very bright. I watched as all of his charming features light up, then felt a little bit creepy for staring at him so much.

"Its Roxas." He said. And for the first time in my life, I may have actually _swooned. _Just at the sound of his very name, I felt my heart skip a beat. How Kairi of me...

I blushed, feeling his gaze on me. I was having a little bit of difficulty keeping my eyes on his, so I often looked around the table awkwardly.

"I'm sorry I called you a freak." He apologized, taking me completely off guard. To be honest, I'd forgotten about it already.

"Thats okay." I said. He shifted in his seat uncomfortably.

"Look, uh, Naminé... I don't want you to tell anybody what happened that night when we met." He kept his gaze locked on mine. "Its very important, okay?" I couldn't help feeling like he was treating me like a two year old, but I easily got past it.

After a moment, I nodded in agreement. "Okay."

He stared at me for a very long, almost endless second. I noticed that it felt that way whenever he looked me in the eyes, and said nothing. He looked as though he was expecting something, but once he realized that I had nothing left to say, he chuckled wholeheartedly.

"What is funny?" I inquired shyly. He calmed his laughter and smiled at me, causing my heart to skip yet another beat.

"Don't you wanna know why?" He asked through a chuckle. I frowned slightly and shook my head.

"I don't know if thats any of my business..."

"Of course it is!" He exclaimed. "I'm telling you what you can't do. Don't you want to know why?"

I thought for a moment. "Well when you put it that way..."

"Look, you seem nice enough, so as long as you _promise _not to tell, I'll fill you in." He hushed his voice and tilted his head down. "Only cause you have the right to know."

"O-Okay." I stuttered, a little unsure of what else to say.

"Okay. Well you see, that night I found you being attacked by the Org guys, they came to see me later on. You know, after I took you home." He explained. "Normally, they're afra-- ...They avoid me. Uh, I dunno why... Anyways, they told me that they would get their leader involved if I told anyone they were going to attack you. And I don't want to mess with their leader-- Trust me, you don't either. Also, they said that if I told you about them and they found out, they would kill you, and probably me too." I gasped a little, afraid to ask if he meant _kill _literally. "But I had already mentioned their name to you. I hoped that we would never meet again, so you couldn't ask me about them. I don't want you to know about them, and I'm not going to tell you."

After his brief explanation, I nodded my head profusely. "I understand." I reassured. "I don't exactly know what you mean but... I don't think I want to know."

He laughed. "You definitely don't."

"A-Alright. I promise I won't tell." _Not like I have anyone to tell, anyways..._

He nodded and smiled. "Okay, glad to hear it." He picked up the menu and scanned it. "You hungry? Its on me."

I politely shook my head. "Oh, no thanks... My uncle doesn't like when I eat before dinner, because then I never finish my meal..."

"Oh really?" He asked, smiling mischievously. I couldn't help but wonder why. "Well, if you insist on not having anything... _I'm _going to enjoy a _delicious _chocolatelava cake!"

My eyebrows furrowed in confusion. Was he... _Tempting me? _Suddenly, I was at a complete loss for words. He ordered a cake from the waitress, and within minutes she returned with a tasty looking brown cake, drenched in chocolate sauce. My mouth watered...

"Sure ya don't want some?" He mused, digging up a piece of cake with his fork. He then dangled it in my face.

"Hey, I'm not a dog." I frowned jokingly, and he chuckled, taking the bite of cake. It was unforeseen, but I felt this strange pang of joy rush through me. And I realized then, that he was the first person to ever laugh at one of my sad, pathetic attempts at humor. I could hardly believe it...

"If you say so." He smirked slyly, slowly devouring his cake. The more he ate of it, the more I wanted it...

And once there was only one scrap left on the plate, I quickly grabbed a plastic fork and...

"Hey!" He shouted, alarmed. I laughed at his shocked expression as I inhaled the last morsel of cake.

"Sorry." I said quietly, though it was not a serious apology. "I _love _chocolate lava cake..."

"Yeah, me too." He grumbled. "But you ate it all on me."

"What! I had one, tiny bite."

And so continued our little war about the cake. I was surprised at how quickly I'd become comfortable around Roxas-- Well, not exactly comfortable but... You know. I could talk to him without blushing hardcore, or feeling sick to the stomach. I discovered that day how much of a funny, enjoyable guy he was. I could then see why he was so popular; It wasn't just for his good looks. His beauty was skin deep as well, but I didn't really realize that at the time. I knew it, but had no words to describe it.

The rest of the afternoon quickly became history. I don't recall anything significant happening after that; Only Roxas kindly walking me home (who decided that chivalry is dead?). I went home that night in a shockingly good mood. As always Cloud greeted me and noted how I was feeling. Uncle Ansem was still at the school, and Kairi and Xion were god knows where. So I continued with my nightly routine, nothing new or different about it. Only thing was, when I went to sleep that night all I could think about was what Roxas had said to me. About that strange Organization. Surly it was nothing serious. I then drifted into a unique dream, one I would always remember.

* * *

_My eyes fluttered open at the sound of a boy's voice, slowly revealing my blue irises. The area was pitch black from the night sky, and I wondered why the moon wasn't lighting up the area. As I adjusted my vision, I tried to process where exactly I was, but only drew a blank. The area surrounding was foreign, that was for certain. My head was pounding and my eyes watered. The grass below me was cold and damp-- Uncomfortable, but when I tried to move my body ached and I just couldn't. Defeated, I lay my head back onto the soggy ground below me._

_"Sorry for the grass," A male's voice drifted to my hearing, shocking me instantly. I thought I was alone; Apparently not. I tried to remember how I got to this place. "I can move you if you'd like."_

_I suppressed a groan and it shocked me how real it all seemed. But all of a sudden, there was a crash, followed by--_

_"Naminé..." and I was startled awake._

_* * *_

Last night's dream did not really effect my thinking as I walked to school. I had come to the obvious conclusion that it was just a dream-- It meant nothing. So I shoved it to the back of my memory, and mentally prepared myself for the day ahead of me.

The day went on as it normally would, nothing interesting nor exciting happened, much to my disappointment. Roxas wasn't even there. At least, I didn't see him. Until after school rolled around, and I walked home alone (as if my sisters would wait for me). Cloud took too long to get ready to leave after, what with all his friends talking to him and such. I popped in my ipod and listened to Angels and Airwaves as I would normally do, because their music kept my mind off things.

And thats when he decided to show up for the third time.

Roxas walked strangely as he approached me. I noticed him trip on the sidewalk and stumble to regain the balance that shouldn't have needed that much effort. I wondered but knew not to ask.

"Hey Naminé." He said, his blue eyes droopy and red. He looked like a sick person,'

"Hey." I muttered shyly, trying to keep my cool.

"Uhm..." He looked down, and swiftly buried his hands in his pockets. "I was looking for you today."

"Oh really?" I blushed. "I didn't see you at school at all."

"I-I know." He stuttered. "I didn't, well, technically go."

"Why not? Are you sick?"

He chuckled and shook his head. "Nah, I just had things to do. But I showed up at lunch to find out, because I wanted to introduce you to a friend of mine."

I couldn't help but beam very brightly. _He wants me to meet his friends?_

_Swoon._

"Who's that?" I inquired, still smiling as sweetly as I could.

"Just an ex-Org member. Recently got kicked out, actually. He's a really cool guy."

I nodded.

"Maybe tomorrow? Or tonight?"

I nodded again, this time with more enthusiasm. "I'm not doing anything right now."

He smiled at me then, a bright, toothy grin that turned my knees to hot wax right there. And after that, he took my hand-- cool to the touch --and lead me towards his friend's place. Our conversation as we walked was awkward and meek for me, but I don't think Roxas noticed. He seemed to be perfectly comfortable walking in silence, and simply laughed or replied to the tiny things I said. We entered a neighborhood I wasn't used to. It was on the other side of the school, opposite to where I lived. This area brought together small, unkept houses that all looked like they needed to be completely rebuilt. They were that out of shape. And suddenly, I no longer felt safe.

Maybe it was judgmental of me to be afraid of the neighborhood, just because of its houses, but there was something about the air that made me feel uneasy. I never knew a place like this existed. It didn't take me long to realize that we were no longer in my own rich part of Twilight Town-- We were in the bad part of town, the ghetto, the wrong side of the tracks... Whatever you want to call it, I was there. We passed one huge trailer park and a couple abandoned chinese food restaurants before we arrived at this guy's place. And of course, his house had to be the worst.

It was a small, dinky flat with placid orange walls, a standard front door, dead garden and one window, which was 'decorated' with a huge hole smashed into it. I wanted to trust Roxas, but I didn't know him that well, did I? No, I certainly didn't.

Roxas just opened the door and let us in, not even having to ask. That would never be acceptable in my area, unless you actually live in the house. The inside of the house reeked of cigarette smoke and other things I was unsure of. We walked down to the basement, which was unfinished so you could see all of the pink insulation. There was a love seat, a couch and one lounge chair. And on that lounge chair, sat a familiar looking redhead with piercing green eyes. I immediately recognized him as Xion's friend Axel.

And **I knew what that meant.**

* * *

**Author's note: **Hey everybody, thanks for the reviews. I'm glad you like it xD. Sorry this is moving so slow D:

**Review please! :)**


	6. It felt weird

** D O N T P A N I C ;  


* * *

**_Chapter six;** i**_**_t felt weird  


* * *

  
-RxN- _**

_Awkward._

_Awkward._

_Soooo awkward..._

Sorry, but 'awkward' was the absolute only thing running through my mind.

There I sat, yes, _awkwardly _beside Roxas on the small sofa (I swear there were puke stains) with my knees held close together, my back straight and my arms crossed securely over my tummy. I guess you could say, I _definitely _looked as out of place as I felt.

Definitely.

I didn't speak, not once. I only listened to what Roxas and this weirdo were saying, and tried to hide how frightened I was. Basically, I was trapped inside of a criminals house. This guy tried to _kidnap _me, for crying out loud! This Axel person, I knew for certain now, was most definitely a part (presumably the leader) of that whole epidemic that had occurred not so long ago. The more I thought about it, the most eager I was to leave.

I tried to focus on Roxas. He made me feel at least semi-safe, considering he'd rescued me before and was proving himself to be a decent person. Then again, why was he now hanging out with the guy? I recalled earlier, how he'd mentioned that Axel was an 'ex-member' of some organization. Perhaps he's a good guy?

I looked at him, and watched in disgust as he took a drag from some funky smelling cigarette.

_Not._

And so I did all I was willing to do. And that, of course, was wait. If only I had to guts to tell Roxas I wanted to leave...

"Want some?" Axel offered Roxas, extending his long arm out, beckoning him to accept that that strange cigarette. I'd smelled cigarettes before, but this one was different. I was worried that Roxas would except it, because I really couldn't stand smokers. But thankfully, he politely declined. I couldn't help but wonder if he'd only said no because I was there.

I was caught off guard when Axel's very green gaze locked on me. "You want some?"

"W-What?" I squeaked, nervousness evident in my voice.

"You want some?" He repeated himself, laughing.

I immediately shook my head. "Um... No thanks."

I was worried that he would press me further, but to my advantage he simply shrugged it off and took himself another drag. The smell, though not as disgusting as normal cigarettes, still made me want to vomit _(what's another puke stain to this disgusting couch?). _

"So," Axel began, his eyes on me, "You're Xion's sister?"

I weakly nodded. _Why is he talking to me?_

"Cool, cool. Me and her are good friends, have been for awhile." He explained. "Roxas, you know her too, yeah?"

"Barely." He answered. "The other girl, Kairi was babbling to me--" He stopped himself, and quickly sent me an apologetic look. "Oops! Sorry, I forgot this is your sister I'm talking about..."

I smiled and shook my head. "That's okay. Trust me, I find her irritating too..."

He chuckled. "Ah, alright. So, as I was saying, Kairi was babbling to me about Xion and how 'annoying' she is."

"Funny, Xion was saying the exact same thing about Kairi earlier today." Axel laughed. "They're always going at each other, you probably know that, eh Naminé?"

**It felt weird** hearing him say my name. Actually, everything about what had happened that day made me feel like I was trapped in some foreign country, no way out. But even still, I had to at least try to keep my cool.

"Yeah..." I answered quietly. If I hadn't been so shy, it really would have been a great opportunity for me to get into the conversation, but at the time I really had no desire. I did, however have a lot to say about Xion and Kairi. I decided that I could talk about them all I wanted to Roxas later, when I felt more comfortable. I did have to admit though, Axel didn't seem like such a bad guy. Sure, he was smoking something funky, had a decently gross house and kinda scared me but... Past those things, I could tell why Xion was friends with him. I could also tell why Kairi thought he was weird.

"Kairi's annoying." Axel stated, slouching in his chair.

"I agree." Roxas nodded. "I talk to her for two seconds and she's like 'blah blah blah, my hair, blah blah blah, my clothes, my this, my that...'" He shook his head and laughed. "Like, seriously, shut the hell up." I couldn't help but giggle, catching Roxas' attention. His eyes on mine made my cheeks tinge, but by now I was moderately used to it. "I take it you don't like her very much, eh?" He asked me, and I nodded.

"As my sister, I'm forced to care about her. She as a person..." I paused. "Well, I to be honest I kinda hate her."

Both Axel and Roxas laughed wholeheartedly, which made me smile. People actually laughing at my jokes? I liked that.

"Anyways," Roxas started, bringing himself to his feet and looking at me. "It's getting late, we better go."

"Okay." I said, standing.

"Alright, you know the way out." Axel said, waving. "See ya." His eyes met mine once more. "Oh, and nice to meet you, Naminé. I never even knew Xion had another sister until recently."

I wanted to say: 'That doesn't surprise me' but I decided that was just a bit rude, so instead, smiled weakly at him and said: "Oh, thank you, nice to meet you too." And then followed Roxas up the stairs and out the door, secretly very happy to be leaving.

"Sorry if that was boring." Roxas apologized to me, as we walked down the street. I noticed that it had gotten considerably darker outside than since we'd arrived.

"That's okay." I replied sweetly. "It wasn't boring." _Scary, maybe, but not boring._

"That's good." He slipped his hands into the pockets of his jacket. "You can come back anytime you like. Axel's a really nice guy, even though he does tend to give off crappy first impressions."

I laughed quietly. "Alright, I'll remember that."

We walked in silence for a few minutes, in which I decided what to say next. I really wanted to ask Roxas if Axel was dangerous at all, but I didn't want to give off the impression that I didn't like him. And I didn't necessarily _not _like him, I was just a little skeptical.

Okay, _very _skeptical. But how could I not be?

"I love the stars." Roxas said, ending my chain of thoughts. I looked over to him, to see that he was staring up at the sky. I looked up as well, but only saw the dark blue sky.

"But... There are no stars out." I pointed out, and he laughed.

"Sure there are. There are always stars out, even if we can't see them." He told me. "And look! There's one now." We stopped in our tracks, and both watched as one, tiny bright little light appeared in the sky.

"Wow!" I exclaimed unknowingly. It was probably the first time anyone had seen me actually show enthusiasm, and I could tell Roxas was surprised, for he looked right at me when I said it.

"What's so shocking?" He queried through a chuckle. My face instantly turned crimson.

"Oh, um well..." I murmured. "I haven't actually seen a star come out before."

"Oh yeah? Cool, isn't it?"

"Yes." I nodded, gaze turning from his face to the single star. "Very cool."

I looked at Roxas, and just as I was about to say something, we heard voices nearby. Roxas cautiously looked around, trying to detect who was speaking, but no luck. The voices were gone.

"Probably just someone in their house." He said, just as we heard the voices again. And they were getting closer. "Juuust in case," He sang, "Lets leave."

I nodded in agreement, silently following behind.

"I don't wanna scare you, Naminé..." He began, "But there are some bad kids that hang around this neighborhood, especially at night. Haha, you probably already knew that."

"Bad kids?" I asked. "What do you mean?"

"I guess not..." He muttered. "Um, just don't worry about it. I'll just take you home now, yeah? Your uncle is probably wondering where you are."

"My uncle?" I asked, thinking. How did he know...?

"Mhm."

"How... Did you know I lived with my uncle?" I couldn't resist inquiring. I didn't mean to sound suspicious, or rude or anything, I was really just curious.

"You told me." He laughed with good nature. That seemed to be Roxas, a very 'good natured' person.

"Oh." I said dumbly. "Right, sorry, I guess I forgot."

"It's alright."

As we walked, it seemed that those voices we'd heard earlier were getting louder, and sure enough as soon as we turned the corner there were a couple guys standing in a group. I began to get a bit worried. What if they're the 'bad kids'? _No one Roxas can't handle, I hope._

"Shit." Roxas said, and I guess that when I _really _got scared. At that very moment, when all four heads turned to look at us and Roxas came to a halt, I could literally feel the fright pulsing through my veins. I just wanted to get home right away, and that was that.

"Who are they?" I whispered to him.

"Stay close to me." He ordered, ignoring my question. He took my hand in his and pulled my closer to him, so our arms touched as we walked. Naturally, I was awkward with this position, but it's better than getting killed, right?

My heart was beating quickly as we walked past them. Roxas didn't look at them so I didn't either, but they were certainly looking at us. More like watching, really...

I let out a relieved sigh as I thought we were at safety. We reached the end of the street, so I assumed it would be all smooth sailing from there. But just as we were about to fully escape the watchful eyes of these strange people, I heard one man shout, his voice booming:

"Wait."

And would you believe, we actually stopped?

* * *

**Author's Note: **Heeeey everybody! Happy new year (and merry late christmas XD). Sorry that I haven't really been updating this, writers block aahh. But I'm back on track now so expect another update soon(:.

Also watch out for updates for **The Sun & The Moon **and **Giving it Away. ** Thanks for reviewing those, this and my other stories. My account wouldn't be alive if you didn't:)

**Review please! ;D**


	7. I would wait forever

**D O N T P A N I C ;**

* * *

_Chapter seven__; _**_I would wait forever_**

* * *

**- RxN -**

I had this odd, unfamiliar feeling about me as the men approached us. Maybe it was the air these people gave off, or maybe it was the strep throat I didn't know I had at that time. Or maybe, perhaps I just _knew _that something bad was going to happen. I just knew it.

"Well if it isn't number thirteen, Roxas." One man said, a sly smile crossing his lips. I couldn't see the rest of his face, because he, like everyone else, had his hood up. I wondered what he meant by 'number thirteen'.

"Xaldin." Roxas said. He quickly slipped his hand into mine, and held it tightly. This, of course, was _not _a good sign.

"What brings you to this neck of the woods?" The man, Xaldin, Roxas had called him, said. His voice was deep, and he sounded much older than the two of us. "I thought you were 'too good' to even be seen around here anymore."

"You don't know what you're talking about." Roxas stated. I could tell he was getting angry.

"Don't I?" He inquired, taking a step closer. Naturally, this alarmed me, so I took a hasty step back, hiding myself slightly behind Roxas' arm.

"Scared, poppet?" Another man asked me, an amused grin worn on his face.

"What do you want?" Roxas queried through gritted teeth.

"Aww Roxas, doncha wanna see us?" A younger one, probably around the same age as Axel asked.

"Look-- I can't." Roxas said. "I have to go, now." He tried to turn and leave, but Xaldin reached out and placed his hand on Roxas' shoulder, stopping him. He turned around once again, his expression almost frightened-- _Almost. _

"Now hold on there, Roxas." Xaldin slurred.

"Yeah, we ain't done with ya yet." Another one said. Though I could not see their faces, they all scared me. Or maybe, it was _because _I couldn't see them that really chilled me to the bone.

"You quit, Roxas." Xaldin said. He then lowered his hood, revealing as I suspected, an older man, with long, dark hair that was held in cornrows. He looked tough-- Like he'd been through a lot. "You can't quit."

And the rest happened to quickly. Xaldin's light touch on Roxas' shoulder quickly became a harsh grip, and he pulled him right out of my clutches. I screamed and instinctually took a jump back, and watched in absolute horror as Xaldin began to beat him. He punched and punched, and it just wouldn't stop. I think one of the men actually _laughed _as Roxas, literally, got beaten to a pulp. I started to cry quickly into the fight when I saw that Roxas was struggling; Fighting back, but he was powerless. Completely, utterly, powerless.

"Stop it!" I shouted, hoping that there might be a chance it would help, but I don't even think they heard me. If they did, they clearly didn't care.

Finally, Xaldin punched Roxas for the umpteenth time, ending it there. He threw his almost lifeless body onto the tarmac road, right before my feet. Instantly, I dove to my knees, landing by his side. I didn't care about the painful scratches I'd inflicted upon myself-- They were nothing compared to what Roxas must have been enduring. The men laughed, every single on of them.

"I don't know why you're wasting your time, girly." Xaldin said to me, his gaze piercing me deeply; As easy as shoving a pipe cleaner through jello. I would never forget those stone cold eyes that read no emotion, pouring into my very soul and ridding me of any sense of security I had left. I felt so scared that they would try to do something to me, but thank God, they didn't. "This boy," He continued, "who you apparently care about. He's a criminal."

And with that, they all turned and walked away, their stupid smirks still worn on their faces. I wanted to ask: 'How can you call him a criminal, when you just _beat the living shit _out of him!' but I didn't. Instead, I watched at they walked down the street, and only looked away when I knew they were gone, and weren't coming back. I looked down at Roxas' face and was instantly horrified by what had happened to him. His eye and cheek were both bruised severely and he had bleeding gashes all over his face. One, particularly large one, crossed from his hairline, down the side of his forehead.

Trust me, it's worse than it sounds.

"Roxas," I said, my voice pleading. I knew that he wasn't dead... But it also wasn't too late for him to allow himself to slip away, right before my very eyes. His eyes squinted, and very slowly he opened them, revealing those big blue orbs of his. They were filled with evident pain that made my heart cringe.

"Naminé," He said, wincing from the pain of even talking. "You stayed." I nodded, and for some reason, he laughed. "That was stupid."

"I couldn't leave you." I told him. "I would never be able to live with myself."

There were many long moments of silence before he replied; "Thank you." I could tell by how genuine his smile was, that he really was thankful for me being there. His cuts there bleeding worse now, so I tore a piece of cloth from the shirt and used it to wipe them. "You don't have to do this." He informed me, and I shook my head.

"Of course I do."

He then raised his hand, capturing my wrist. "No, you don't. You have to go home, Naminé."

"I'm not just gonna leave you here." I informed him, frowning, and he chuckled.

"God, you're stubborn."

"I know." I said, continuing to clean his cuts. The one on his forehead was even more deep than I'd expected, so it was taking extra time to rid of the blood. He laughed, I don't know why. So I laughed too. "You look like Harry Potter." I told him, grinning as the tears on my face dried. He laughed even harder, but quickly stopped himself. Even laughing caused him pain. "Can you walk?" I asked, and he nodded.

"Maybe."

"I'll help you." I got up and didn't bother brushing the dirt off of my pants. I offered him my hand, and slowly helped him hoist himself to his feet. I took his arm and slung it over my shoulder.

"My legs aren't injured, you know." He said matter-of-factly, but I knew he was only kidding. "I can walk."

"I know." I chimed, smiling. "But I'm helping you, and we're going to the hospital."

He stopped me there, turning completely serious. "No. Not the hospital. I'm walking you home, Naminé, and then I'm going home myself."

"Roxas..." I took his arm off of me so I could face him. All of a sudden, he was avoiding my eyes. I pouted at him. "_I'm _stubborn? Look at how hurt you are! You need medical help!"

"No I don't." He stated. "Its just a few cuts and bruises, Naminé. This isn't the first time it's happened, I'll be fine."

I began to grow frustrated with him, growing more and more ecstatic by the moment. _"Just who are you, anyways!?"_

And I wish I'd never asked that question.

He looked me dead in the eye, his once brilliant blue orbs showing viciousness, telling me a story of the years of violence he'd endured. He grabbed me harshly (not too harshly, mind you, I believe he was merely getting his point across) by the shoulders. "You want to know _just who I am, _do you?" He queried. I looked at him with shock, and even fear. This wasn't nice Roxas I'd been getting to know. This was violent, brash Roxas-- This was Organization Roxas. "I'll tell you who I _fucking _am."

When he said that, well needless to say, I flinched. And I flinched_ hard. _Hard, as in, I was truly frightened of him. And a part of me, in all honesty, was. At that moment, when he saw the look of fright in his eyes, I could see something change in him. His eyed widened and all of their passion filled them once again, relieving me inside. He let go of my shoulders and took a hasty step back.

"I-I'm sorry." He muttered. Though he didn't look me in the eye, I could see that they were becoming glassy.

"Don't be." I said softly, stepping closer to him. "I shouldn't be so... So nosey. It's really none of my busi--"

"Stop that." He interrupted, furrowing his eyebrows. "Stop trying to blame yourself, when its obvious that all of this is my fault. You shouldn't have had to witness that-- God, what was I thinking bringing you to this area? An innocent girl like you-- What the hell is wrong with me?"

"Now you stop that." I practically demanded him. He looked at me with shock, and I couldn't help but smirk at that priceless expression of his. "What, didn't think I had it in me?" I teased.

"That sounded like an _order, _Naminé." He smiled a very cute, innocent and playful smile. "Bold, bold, bold!" And suddenly, the depressing, doubtful ora surrounding us dissolved with our moods, and all was at peace. I thanked whatever gods there were out there for ending the little quarrel. I knew that then, at least for the night, things would no longer look down on us.

"Now," He said, "I'm taking you home."

I was stubborn-- Yes, I knew that. But in this fight, there was no way I could win. So, I let Roxas take me home and I let him walk home by myself.

"Bye, Naminé." He had said, leaving me alone once again. And I had never felt that way-- So eager to _not _part with someone. I just wanted to stay with him and talk more. But we parted ways there, and needless to say as I watched him walk away from my mansion, through the forest, I worried about him. What if those men came back? Surely they wouldn't just walk past him. Surely...

I had a very unsettling sleep that night. Even though it was nearly 2:00 am, I felt completely awake. I was energetic, something that rarely happened to me. I knew that it was because my brain was overwhelmed, and when I finally did fall asleep (around 4:00) I had quite the dream.

* * *

I walked to school by myself the next day. It was the first time I'd ever done this, considering Cloud never wanted to let me out of his sight. I didn't know why he was so protective of me, but I had a hunch that it was because I was the only quiet, peaceful person in the house, other than Uncle Ansem of course. I had left early while everyone was still eating breakfast. This would mean that I would be stuck at school for even longer than usual, but that day I didn't mind.

I wanted to get to Roxas as soon as I could. I hoped that maybe he would be there early, too, but he wasn't. I waited and waited for him, but he didn't come. Even at lunch, as I sat alone in the stairwell he didn't pass and I heard no word of him from the others. Instead of the other days constant chatter about 'the new kid', nobody seemed to mention him that day. At least, not around me.

I had this certain unrecognizable, longing feeling inside me. It made me feel weak and my stomach turned-- But the real agony was held right in my heart. That longing feeling tugged and pulled at my chest, leaving me breathless. I was anxious, I assumed, and nervous too. But I couldn't deny a part of me knew that something inside me was different. Something had changed.

I was not a stupid girl. Naive, yes, but never stupid. The whole idea that was forming in my head made me feel silly-- _I'm too young. _I told myself. _I couldn't possibly feel this way for someone I hardly know. _But denying it got me nowhere. The way he showed interest in me, the way he never ignored my quiet little speeches, and especially the way he was exactly like the hero I'd been dreaming of, just made me so... _happy._ Because in all truth, he _was _that hero. He was the only person who had ever saved me from anything.

I guess it was then that I realized that** I would wait forever** just for another chance to see him. It was then, that I realized my feelings for Roxas were more than just of friendship.

* * *

**Author's note: **Hey everyone. Here's an update, haha I hope you like it.

**Please review and let me know if you're still reading this, I hardly got any reviews the last chapter D:.**


	8. Because that's just who I am

**D O N T P A N I C ;**

* * *

_Chapter eight; **because that's just who I am**_

* * *

**-RxN-**

"What's up, Spunk?"

My head lifted to meet the cerulean eyes of none other than Cloud. For but a split second, my heartbeat increased when I met these eyes, thinking for only a moment that it was _him_-- But that was just stupid. Roxas would never call me 'Spunk', a name given to me specifically by that lovely older brother of mine.

"Oh, Cloud..." I greeted, sounding unintentionally unenthusiastic. His orbs darkened with what looked to be concern, and for some reason, he approached me. He swung his backpack off of his shoulder and set it down on the floor, taking a seat across from me in the stairwell. I simply stared at him, eyes wide with confusion.

He looked me dead in the optic and just came out with it. "Why did you leave without me this morning?"

I lowered my head, slightly ashamed. Though I didn't show it very well, it truly touched me how Cloud showed me such regard. The way his eyes looked when we spoke was always so comforting...

"Did something happen?" He inquired when I didn't reply to his previous question. I shook my head.

"N-No..." I stammered quietly, nervously.

"Naminé, I was worried."

My head instantly snapped up, meeting those familiar eyes of his. I was trying to pay attention, really, I was... But when I saw that shade of blue, the blond hair, all I could think about was Roxas.

"I'm sorry." I apologized genuinely, re lowering my gaze. "I didn't mean to scare you..."

He smiled warmly at me. "It's okay. Just promise me you won't do it again."

I cocked my head to the side curiously. "Why?" I couldn't help but ask. I knew that Cloud worried about me when I wandered off by myself, but he was acting a tidbit too serious, I thought.

He chuckled. "Think about it... Imagine if I didn't walk in the morning? What would you have to listen to?"

I obeyed him, and thought about it for only a moment. Of course, it didn't take long for me to figure out what he meant. "Oh, god... Kairi and Xion."

Cloud nodded defiantly. "Exactly. So, if you're gonna run off in the morning, for whatever reason, at least let me know? We can ditch the evil step sisters and just walk together."

I giggled and concurred, always amused with my brother's sense of humor. "That sounds great."

I wanted Cloud to stay with me for the rest of the lunch period, but unfortunately for me he had a meeting of some sort. After all, being on the newest nominee for the upcoming Student Body President election came with some duties. And so I was left there, by myself once again, not that I really minded. The only person's company I longed for was that of Roxas.

As I sat there cross legged, blank sketchbook sprawled across my lap, I just couldn't seem to focus on drawing. My thoughts were all jumbled; Thoughts of Cloud and how sweet he was to me, and thoughts of Roxas and where he was. It was needless to say I was worried about him; What if those men really did find him again while walking home? What if they...

No.

I didn't allow myself to think such... Impure things. Roxas was alive and Roxas was well. At least, as far as I knew.

Appalled by the vision I had almost thought of, I allowed my mind to wander elsewhere. And naturally, I went to Cloud. A small smile tugged at my lips, as comforting childhood memories rushed back into mind. I recalled days where I could actually feel happiness-- Where I was nothing but a child. I wondered how I'd allowed myself to become so distant...

Why was I the one left out? Why was it me who was overcome with such depression, and not Kairi or Xion? Why did I end up being the girl sitting alone every lunch, too afraid to look strangers in the eye?

_**Because that's just who I am.**_

I was beyond that 'why me' stage of my life. Now, I was simply trying to get by.

* * *

Days passed, and still no word of Roxas. By Friday, I began to get really, _really_ worried; What if something bad really did happen to him? Just thinking about it made my skin crawl... But even still, it was all that could run through my mind.

The day was a particularly chilly one as I walked home, sketchbook clutched to my chest. Sadly I hadn't thought it would be so cold, so I didn't bring a jacket. I definitely regretted that decision. My mind, evidently wasn't focused on the cold, though. The day was over and I'd been thinking about it forever, but I still couldn't get Roxas off my mind. It was a new kind of worry-- It was more like panic. If only I had some way of contacting him...

And that's when I ran into Axel.

"Oi, Naminé, that you?" His familiar voice sounded from somewhere nearby, and I turned on my heel in alarm. And sure enough, I met his shockingly friendly green eyes.

"Oh, h-hello." I greeted awkwardly.

"Long time no talk!" He chuckled, walking towards me. For some reason, I felt slightly scared, but quickly reminded myself that Axel couldn't be dangerous. He was friends with Roxas, after all, and I'd already been in the guys house, so... "How you doing?" He observed me more closely, catching me off-guard before I could even contemplate his question. "You look upset. Something happen?"

"Uhm, no, it's nothing..." I muttered avoiding eye contact, a bad habit I always did whilst lying to someones face. I hoped that Axel wasn't clever enough to figure that out...

"Is it about Roxas?" He suddenly blurted out. My eyes snapped to his, shocked by his random assumption.

"R-Roxas?"

He nodded. "Yeah. Kid hasn't been in school for a while, I just thought you'd have noticed."

"Oh, yes... I have noticed."

"Aaaand let me guess... You have no clue where he is, and are worried to hell?"

My eyes widened. _Is it that obvious, or is he physic?_ I guess that Axel could tell what my answer was just by reading my expression, because his face instantly changed. He went from completely casual, to utterly serious before my very eyes.

"Naminé... Why don't we take a walk?"

* * *

**Author's note: **Hey everyone, thanks so much for the reviews! I got more than I expected, which made me very happy :)! Sorry that this chapter is kind of short (and late!), but it's all relevant.

Y'know, this is one of my least popular stories, but it's probably one of my favorites... I just love writing it :o.

**Please review! Your support keeps my motivation alive :)**


	9. Just who exactly is he?

**DON'T PANIC**

* * *

_Chapter nine; **just who exactly is he?****  
**_

* * *

**-RxN-**

The autumn air was cool as Axel and I walked down the street. We didn't have any destination in mind, we just walked aimlessly to make time to speak. As always, I was nervous.

"Listen..." Axel began, breaking the silence. "I know where Roxas is."

I looked to him in shock. "Is he okay?"

"Yeah, I guess you could say that." He shrugged.

"Well what is that supposed to mean? Did something happen to him?"

"Heh. Roxas' pride is too high for his own good, I'm gunna assume that night you guys got attacked he said he wasn't going to the hospital?"

"Yeah... He insisted on walking me home."

"Well, after he did that, he passed out on the street. Thankfully someone found him and called an ambulance." Axel explained, and I didn't know what to think. The only concern I had was his safety.

"So he is alright?" I asked depserately hoping for a straight answer.

"Yes. But, I don't know if you realized that night, the asshole that beat up poor Roxy was wearing brass knuckles when he attacked. Roxas' cheeck bone is slightly fractured and one of his ribs is slightly broken. He's actually lucky he didn't get killed, Xaldin must have gone easy on him..."

"Oh my goodness!" I exclaimed. "I have to visit him. Please take me, Axel."

"Well he's not in the hospital anymore, he's just resting at home. I'm sorry kiddo, but I don't think Roxas would be too happy. As I said earlier, his pride is very tall. I doubt he wants you to see him like that."

"P-Please? Can you at least ask him to see me?"

Axel groaned and rolled his emerald orbs. "Ahhh, alright, fine. I'll call him." He whipped out his cellphone and dialed a number quickly with a slightly irritated expression on. He held the phone to his ear and waited for an answer. After a moment, he said "Hello? Yo, Roxas? What's up man... Oh I'm actually with Namine right now, I ran into her after school... Yeah, I told her what happened cause you didn't have the balls to." I heard slight yelling through the phone and Axel chuckled. "Of course I told her man, the poor girl was sitting around all worried that you'd gotten killed by those assholes."

My face flushed. "Well she wants to come see you really bad." The redhead continued. "Don't be so egotistical, Namine isn't going to think you're a coward." _Of course not. _I thought in my head. _Roxas is extremely brave, more brave then I could ever dream of being... _"Alright dude, see you in a bit." He hung up the phone and I looked up at him with hopeful eyes.

"Well?"

"He said yes."

I smiled brightly. "Thank you, Axel."

"Ehh, no problem." He brushed it off and we continued down the street. "You know Namine, I really don't want you to think Roxas is weak either... To be completely honest, he's one of the toughest guys who were ever in the- um, this part of town."

"I don't think he's weak at all." I answered truthfully. "I think he is extremely brave."

"Yeah he really is. He can take out pretty much anyone, but at the same time he's still human. It would be difficult for anyone to fight back while being pumbled with brass knuckles by a 45 year old man."

Just saying that sent chills up my spine. _Poor Roxas..._

* * *

"No one knows about this place but me, so you're lucky that Roxas let me bring you here. I guess he really trusts you, eh?" Axel said as we approached a five story apartment building. We had walked a good half an hour across town to get there. I blushed and said nothing, and Axel laughed. "Weird, considering you guys barely know each other, but I trust Roxas' judgement well enough."

When we reached the apartment, Axel typed a code into the buzzer and the door clicked open. He opened the and I followed him inside, anxious to see Roxas. We took the elevator up to the top floor, and at the very end of the hallway is where Roxas let us in. My heart fluttered upon seeing him. He didn't look as bad as I thought, but he was still bruised up and definitely didn't look happy. When he saw me, though, he gave a slight warming smile.

"Hey, guys..." He said, letting us in.

"Yo." Axel said.

"H-Hi." I stammered, taking in my surroundings. The apartment was a small, standard apartment. There was an open living room which connected to the kitchen with a small hallway that I assumed lead to his bedroom and to the bathroom. The living room had one large couch, two plush chairs, a coffee table and a flat screen TV with an xbox hooked up. The place smelled of cigarettes, which kinda upset me.

"Have a seat anywhere you'd like, Namine." Roxas said sweetly as he sat down on the couch. Axel took one of the chairs, and I sat beside Roxas. "Sorry the place is kinda a mess..." He chuckled.

"I-It's fine." I stuttered nervously. I noticed there was an ashtray with an excessive amount of butts in it and a pack of Belmonts. _Why is Roxas smoking? _I wondered. _It's so bad for you..._

"So how ya feelin'?" Axel asked, putting his feet up on the table.

"I'm alright..." Roxas replied reluctantly. "Hey Ax would you actually mind if I talked to Namine alone for a few minutes on the balcony?" He briefly looked at me before looking back at Axel. "I owe her an explanation."

"Yeah yeah no problem, go." Axel practically shooed us to the balcony. I grew more and more nervous as we went out and Roxas shut the door behind him. He pulled out a cigarette and lit it, much to my disapproval.

"Sorry about the smoking." He said to me, looking out in the distance with his elbows leaning on the fence. "Just been so stressed out..."

"I-It's okay." I replied instantly. "I kind of understand."

He laughed with good nature. "Yeah, it's a really bad habit. Plus it hurts like hell when I cough because of my, y'know, busted rib..." He took a puff and sighed. "I'm sorry, Namine."

I was surprised by this. "W-What?"

"I'm just... Sorry. We hardly know each other and I feel like I've already put you through a lot."

"I'm just glad you're okay." I said quietly. "I was really worried..."

"I dunno." He shrugged. "I just didn't want to show up to school and be asked all these questions, and I didn't want you to have to see me all marked up again. I'm still so sorry you had to be there to witness that."

"Again, I'm just glad you're okay."

Roxas turned to me then, and took one more drag of his cigarette before flicking it off the balcony. "I need to ask you something." He spoke somewhat sternly, staring deeply into my eyes. I was lost for a moment, my cheeks blushing intensely.

"Y-Yes?" I replied after a moment, my heartbeat increasing.

"Why do you care about me, Namine?" I was startled at this question... My blush grew even deeper, and I didn't know what to say. I awkwardly looked at my feet. "It's just, we barely know each other... Yet you seem to genuinely care what happens to me. Why is that? I just have to ask." When I didn't reply for another few moments, he chuckled slightly. "I'm sorry for making you nervous."

"I-It's okay." I finally peeped. "To answer your question, well to be completely honest... I don't know how much you really know about me, Roxas. You... You saved me that one night in more than one way; I haven't forgotten about you since. You're the first boy to talk to me and actually be nice to me... I have no friends, I've been considered a loser for years, but you just... Don't seem to notice, or care. I dunno, I guess I just... I dunno."

"I don't think you're a loser." He smiled brightly, and in that moment I swore my heart skipped a beat.

"You don't?" There were butterflies in my stomach that were on a complete rampage.

"Not at all! I think you're the nicest girl I've ever met. You're honest and genuine, who cares what a bunch of losers at school think? You obviously just haven't met anyone worth your time yet, if you don't have any friends."

I stared at him wide eyed for a moment, hardly believing what he was saying, before smiling warmly. "Thank you, Roxas." _I can't believe how sweet he is... _I thought. _He can't be real, there's no way._

"Anytime. I know how tough school can be... There's always a lot of really mean kids, I think everyone's been bulliied at one point or another."

"Not Kairi." I groaned, and Roxas laughed.

"No, Kairi has."

I gave him a weirded out look that read disbelief. "No she hasn't, she's always been popular for as long as I can remember."

"Yes but the term 'popular' by todays standards doesn't mean what you think it would mean. Kairi may think that everybody loves her, but all of her friends say mean things about her when she's not around, she just doesn't know about it." He chuckled. "In my opinion, these days popular means that everybody knows your name, not that everybody likes you. But because of Kairi's intimidating personality, no one ever says anything to her face... But believe me, they do talk shit about her."

I didn't really know what to think, I'd never thought about it like that before, but it really did make sense. Kairi was awful towards a lot of people, I always wondered how they could genuinely like being treated like that... I laughed to myself at that point, feeling silly that I'd never really understood. I'd always looked at Kairi as the most loved girl in school, but after listening to what Roxas had said, I realized that she probably was one of the most hated. As mean as it may sound, this thought brought me comfort.

"I never thought about it like that." I said smiling.

"Of course you didn't, because she's probably been planting it in your head for years that you're worthless and she's on top."

I averted his ocean blue gaze. "Is it that obvious?"

"I guess I'm just good at reading people."

There were a few moments of silence before we decided to go back inside and join Axel, who was smoking one of Roxas' cigarettes with his feet up on the coffee table.

"Axel, c'mon man." Roxas complained, kicking his friends feet off his table.

"What?" Axel cocked an eyebrow.

"Coulda asked about the cigarette, you know."

Axel shrugged nonchalantly. "Hey man, not like you should be smoking anyways. You have a fuckin' busted rib."

Roxas blushed and sat down. "It's not that bad... It only hurts when I cough, really."

"And cigarettes make you cough."

"Ehhh, leave me alone." The blonde groaned. I giggled a bit at their argument as I reasumed my position beside Roxas on the couch.

"So, what's the plan dude?" Axel asked putting his feet back up on the coffee table. Roxas gave him an irritated look but chose to say nothing about it.

"I dunno man, I'm not going anywhere." He sighed.

"I mean what are you gunna do about, you know... The situation."

"What am I supposed to do about it? Take them all on by myself?" Roxas' voice was laced with true concern. I felt so terrible for him that he was put in this position. At the same time I still didn't quite understand everything that was happening. "No one fears me anymore, especially after they saw Xaldin almost kill me. I'm not as strong as I used to be... I just don't have it in me anymore."

"You've got me on your side too, bro. I hate them just as much as you do, believe me."

I felt kind of awkward being in the same room as this conversation, it seemed like they were speaking of things I shouldn't have been hearing... But then again, they were talking as if I wasn't even there. My same old insecurities kicked in telling me _you're so much of a nobody that they probably don't even care if you hear any secrets at all because that'show unimportant you are. _But a new voice I'd never heard before seemed to also be speaking to me telling me that maybe the reason why Roxas spoke so openly around me was because he really did trust me that much.

"Well then they'll kill both of us, Axel." Roxas spoke with exasperation.

"This isn't the Roxas I know." Axel stood up, appearing to be angry judging by the expression that creased his brow. "The Roxas I know would never just give up like that. The Roxas I know would be off beating the shit out of each and every one of those guys, don't try to tell me you haven't before cause I've been one of them too. You and I both know that you could have mucked Xaldin that night had he been fighting like a real man with his real fists."

Roxas was silent for a few moments before responding. He seemed to be feeling remorseful, and the more the two said to each other the more out of place I started to feel. I really didn't belong in the middle of that conversation.

"I told you man... I'm not who I used to be. I don't want to live that life anymore."

"Me neither, that's why we _both _got out." My eyes widened in shock a bit. _Roxas... _I thought. _Were you a member of Organization Thirteen too? _I noticed him look at me quickly in his peripherals and jolt up to his feet.

"I'm sorry Namine, you're going to have to excuse us." He spoke sternly. I nodded frantically and Roxas and Axel exited to the balcony. I was scared to look over at them, but when I did it was evident that they were arguing. I could no longer hear them, which was good I guess, but at that point I could not deny my curiosity...

_**Just who exactly is he?**_

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**A/N: **Yeah, I know... It's kinda been two years... BUT I'm bringing this story back. :3 I doubt I still have readers from when I originally posted this, but I hope I do. I'm sorry for dipping out on you guys, and I hope that you can still enjoy the story now even though its been so long.

ALSO the artwork for this story WAS drawn by me; check out my deviantart page for more stuff like that! reckless-abandoned :)

Thanks for reading! Please review if possible :3


	10. His smile, his eyes

**DON'T PANIC**

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_chapter ten; **his smile, his eyes**_

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**-RxN-**

A week passed since I had last seen Roxas. After the squabble him and Axel had, he politely asked us both to leave and for Axel to walk me home.

It was extremely chilly one day as I walked to the variety store at lunch to grab some hot chocolate. It was just a five minute walk down the street, so I decided that it could be good for me to get out of the school at lunch every once in a while. I still assumed my same position in the stair well every day, despite being kind of friends with Axel. I discovered that I was a lot more awkward inside of the school then I was outside of it. When I saw the redhead, I was too scared to even wave.

I crossed my arms over my chest in an attempt to keep warm as the wind harshly burned my skin. I trotted a bit faster once I was in the parking lot of the variety store and rushed inside to the warmth.

As I paid for my hot chocolate, I noticed someone standing around outside the window. He was wearing a dark gray toque with blonde hair poking out the bottom and wore a heavy black hoodie. _Roxas? _I wondered hopefully before rushing outside.

"Roxas!" I exclaimed, smiling happily.

His eyes darted to me furiously. "Shh!" He hushed, clasping a hand over my mouth. Half of his face was covered by a black scarf. "Don't say my name so loud, please." He said in a softer tone, removing his hand from my blushing face.

"I'm sorry." I peeped, feeling incredibly silly.

"It's okay."

"What are you doing here?"

"I came to buy cigarettes." He chuckled bashfully. "This is the only store in town that will sell to me without ID, that I'm aware of anyway. But I can't go in and ask if there are any other customers, I didn't realize that was you in there."

"Ohh, I see." I chimed.

"Well, wait here. I'll be right back." He dashed in the store and within two minutes he was back out. I smiled at him when I saw him, and I think he smiled back. "Sorry, I know you don't appreciate me smoking."

"Don't be sorry, everyone is entitled to their own decisions and opinions."

"Well I'm glad that you understand that." He looked around cautiously before sliding down the scarf and lighting a cigarette. "Needless to say, my stress level hasn't gone down." He lightly grabbed me by the arm and pulled me to the side of the building where we would likely not be seen. "So, you on lunch or something?"

I nodded weakly. "Y-Yeah. Decided to come get some hot chocolate."

"Oh, that's cool. You need to get a cell phone, Namine."

"I-I do? Why?"

"So I can get a hold of you. I'd like to be able to text you and talk to you whenever..." He awkwardly scratched his head and averted my eyes. I was a little shocked; was he... Embarrassed? _About me!? _That was certainly a new one.

"O-Oh." I answered awkwardly as well, face flushed. "I would like that too. My uncle said he would get me one soon... Maybe for christmas."

"That's still so far. If I bought you one, would you use it?"

"I couldn't accept that from you, Roxas."

"No really, I'd want you to have it. It would just be a pay-as-you-go one, but I would be more then happy to refill it whenever you run out of texts." He grinned bashfully and I didn't know what to say. That was so sweet, and so uncalled for... I didn't know what to make of it.

"Is it not expensive? I couldn't take money from you. After all you live on your own, and-"

"Money isn't that big of an issue for me, I'm a cheap guy. I get a welfare check every month that pays for my rent and other things; not the most admirable way to make money, but unfortunately it's all I have right now."

"S-Still..." I tried to object, but it seemed as though he had made up his mind.

"Nope, it's settled! I'm buying you a phone. And don't sweat about the cost, I won't go spending a ton of money on it. It will only get up costing me 40 bucks or so."

"That's still kind of a lot of money." I avoided making eye contact with him because my face was so red from embarrassment. Much to my surprise, Roxas placed a reassuring hand on my shoulder.

"Again, don't sweat it." He beamed. "I told you, I wanna be able to talk to you, and unfortunately it's not that smart for me to be out in public that much right now."

At that point, as much as I genuinely didn't like the idea of him spending that much money on me, I surrendered and nodded. I couldn't deny that I wanted to be able to talk to Roxas whenever I wanted too. Actually, that sounded like a dream come true...

And to think, it was _his _idea.

"I might as well go grab it while I'm out." He told me, flicking his cigarette butt in a puddle. "Will you meet me here when school is over? I know you have to get to class soon."

I looked a the time; only ten minutes to class. "Oh crap, you're right. I don't want to be late."

"Well, I'll meet you at this exact location when classes are over, alright?"

I smiled. "Yeah, I'll be here."

Roxas abruptly pulled me into an embrace, which needless to say, I was not prepared for. My whole body shook anxiously as I weakly attempted to hug him back, but I don't think I was doing a very good job. Suddenly, the chilly fall air wasn't getting to me so much. I think I kind of melted for a moment and solidified in time; the sensation of his body wrapped around mine was foreign yet felt somehow familiar. He let go of me and giggled at my blushing face.

"I'll see you here after school." He winked, before rushing away.

I stared after him blankly. "Y-Yeah... After school..."

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All throughout last period, I was extremely nervous. My mind kept on wandering and I couldn't focus on the lesson at all. I was worried that Roxas wasn't going to show up after school. It scared me how easy it was for him to just disappear. I kept on thinking about him; _**his smile, his eyes**_, everything about him was so wonderful that I couldn't possibly imagine I would ever have someone so great as a friend.

When I thought about him, my stomach fluttered and I instantly grew anxious... But not necessarily in a bad way. I was anxious to see him again because I liked being around him so much. So when after school finally rolled around, I was at the store within five minutes. It made me smile with a warming relief when I saw that Roxas was already waiting there.

"Hey, you came!" He waved and smiled through the scarf which still covered his face.

"Of course I did." I peeped.

"I was worried you were gunna ditch me." He chuckled jokingly, reaching into his pocket. _As if... _I thought. _I would never ditch you, Roxas. I was worried you would ditch me. _For some reason I couldn't find it in myself to say my thoughts out loud, so I stood there silently as he placed a box in my hand.

"Ohh, thank you." I said shyly.

"Open it!" He urged, so hesitantly I did, and inside there was a pale pink "LG" text phone. It was oddly cute, and made me excited to know it was for me. I smiled brightly at him and he returned it.

"Thank you, Roxas." I said. "I really like it, it's pretty."

"I kinda thought you'd like the pink one." He said humbly. "I've already set it up so my number is in it, so whenever you want to talk to me just message me on it. It's a really simple phone, so you'll be able to figure it out pretty fast. You're a smart girl."

I blushed. "Thank you again. I really do appreciate it."

"No worries!" He chimed. "But unfortunately I do have to get back to my apartment."

"Oh, okay then." I probably sounded sad when I said that.

"You wanna come with?"

"Y-Yeah!" I perked up, probably seeming a little too excited, but Roxas only smiled.

"Well then, let's go."


	11. Goodbye for now

**DON'T PANIC**

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_chapter eleven; **goodbye for now****  
**_

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**-RxN-**

"Would you like anything?" Roxas offered as he walked into the kitchen upon arriving at his apartment. I politely declined and he returned to the room with a glass of water. He sat down close to me on the couch and I could feel my heart racing. "So how was school?"

"It was alright. Same old." I responded through an awkward laugh.

"Right on. I really would like to go, getting an education is important, after all, but..." He stopped himself there. "Oh well."

"I hope you can get back in soon. It wouldn't be good if you got kicked out."

"Well, the school knows about my personal life to a certain extent. They know that I have a lot of problems. But after this weekend, I think I'm going to come back."

"Is it safe?"

"I don't know, I don't even know what's going on anymore."

"I wish I could help you."

Roxas smirked. "You are helping me, by being my friend." I was a little shocked by this statement but I smiled regardless. Roxas' expression suddenly twisted with a look of concern. He looked as though he were about to tell me something... But no words escaped his lips. Instead, he seemingly removed the thought from his head and smiled at me.

We sat there and made small talk for about two hours. I had to admit, I was a little impressed with myself in how I was handling my anxiety. I was able to give valid input into the conversation, even started a few myself and made Roxas laugh a couple of times. That last bit made me really happy. Naturally, I was still anxious the entire time but I handled myself better than normal. Roxas really seemed to enjoy my company. I found that incredibly hard to believe, but something told me I wasn't lying to myself when I thought that.

A few days passed until the weekend hit, and the same routine occurred every day. Roxas would meet me at the store after school and take me back to his place. We talked, watched movies and played video games; things I'd always imagined I would do if I had a good friend, but had never been given the opportunity to. I couldn't describe the joy it brought me to finally say I had a friend... And a damn cute one, at that. But of course, the more I got to know Roxas the more I wanted to learn about him.

I had questions, and plenty of them, but every time I thought about asking I always lost the courage. I was too worried that Roxas would be offended or get angry; I didn't want to do or say anything that would potentially ruin whatever we had going on. So I didn't bring anything up; the Organization, or Roxas' history with them, must not have been my business. And even if Roxas was a member, he wasn't now, right? So I didn't let it concern me any further, until late Friday night, he was the one to bring it up.

"Say, Namine..." Roxas muttered, putting down his xbox controller. I was sitting on the floor, while he sat on the couch. I leaned my head back and smiled at him.

"What's up?"

"Uhm, don't you ever wonder, you know, what's up with me and those guys?"

I gave him a perplexed look, before I shifted up on the couch beside him. "Well to be honest... Yeah I do."

"How come you never ask me about any of it?"

I blushed and averted his eyes. Sometimes I really hated how direct he was with me. "I dunno... I don't want to stick my nose where it doesn't belong..."

He chuckled a bit. "I respect that. I was just wondering, I guess. Most people bombard others with questions. You're very respectful in that sense."

"Uhm, thank you." I awkwardly looked away from his sweet smile. I sat there and waited for Roxas to start giving me some answers, but instead he picked the controller back up and started playing Halo again. I couldn't help but pout a little, thinking _I guess if I want answers, I'll have to ask the questions. _But I was still sticking to my original plan; quiet Namine got in the least trouble.

I called Cloud to pick me up around 12 o'clock. I was allowed to stay out a bit later, since it was friday, plus both uncle Ansem and my brother were excited to hear I actually had made a friend, so they were lenient with me. As I was getting ready to leave, Roxas stopped me and gave me a hug at the door.

"Listen, Namine..." He began, still holding me close. I couldn't stop myself from trembling. "I was supposed to tell you this a few days ago... As soon as I got you the phone, actually, I was planning on telling you. But I enjoy your company so much that it was very difficult for me."

I pulled away from him and met his eyes, but for once, it was his that were averting mine. "What do you mean?" I asked quietly, a little sadly.

"We shouldn't be hanging out like this." He blurted. "I never should have gotten you involved in my life."

My heart sank. "W-What? Why?"

"Just by being around you I've put you in danger. Don't you remember what I told you, or have you already forgotten? The Organization told me that if I were to tell you about them and they were to find out about it, it would be seriously bad news. They know who you are now, and it's all because of me."

"T-That's not true. It was their choice to approach me that night-"

"But it was my choice to explain to you who they are. Which was a huge mistake, on my part." I could have sworn his eyes had almost watered. "I'm sorry. But we should seriously stop this."

I felt embarrassed as I tried to resist tears filling my eyes. We hardly knew each other, and it wasn't like we were dating or anything remotely similar. But he was my first friend ever and even still, I doubt he imagined how much he meant to me. Yes, it was insane of me to put so much faith in someone I hardly knew but I wanted to trust him, despite whatever danger he may have been putting me in.

"Please don't get the wrong idea." He said, interrupting my thoughts. "There's nothing wrong with you, I just feel guilty and anxious that being around you is dangerous, Namine. Please try to understand that. The reason why I bought you that phone is so that we can still talk to each other."

"You really still want to talk to me?"

"Yeah, of course... You're my friend. Which is why I'm choosing to stay away from you for a while until I can try to sort shit out."

Although it made me sad, I did understand where he was coming from. It just sucked, and I think I was being a little oversensitive to it. I still felt like maybe there was something wrong with me, despite what he was telling me.

"What if I see you at school?" I inquired shyly.

"A couple of the younger Organization members actually go to our school; I doubt any of them would have been involved in the night you were attacked or the night I was, but it's still not a risk I'm willing to take. I've already made too many foolish mistakes by showing up in public even near the school. And if, by chance they are aware of who you are then they'll probably be looking out for me at school to see who I'm hanging around with."

"Yeah... I guess that's true..."

"But we can text all the time, okay?" He smiled, and I forced a small one back. He hugged me once more, before letting me go. "_**Goodbye for now.**_"

I left in a hurry to meet Cloud, realizing I was already late to meet him and he had probably been waiting for about five minutes. It was hard for me to control my emotions as I recalled the previous conversation, and I realized that I doubt I would be able to hug Roxas like that for a long time.

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Thanks for the reviews guys! Please review if you're reading and enjoying the story :)


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